(O level Results- Disappointment and Dedication) Nostalgic.

Hey people! Received my O level results a couple of hours ago, and i must say that life is really unpredictable. No joke.

I remember the sleepless nights where i buried my head in those books, the many times where i would secretly get up to study under my mother's watchful eye, the incessant repeats of my tutor's recordings. I am just not smart enough. Damn. I did mug like crazy during the last few months and it was tiring. But why are my results not good? why? Part of the blame is to the bell curve, and the other part is to my knowledge. 


On the day itself, i ate llaollao with babe at west mall.Then, we headed out to school, hand in hand. I was not nervous at the very start, just pretty calm and steady. The JASP lasted for 10 minutes, and then the top students names were out. just a little fun , my form teacher was asking me whether my mum was in the presence and whether my CCA grade was and A1. Instantly , i knew something was fishy down there. BAM.

When the top scorers results were revealed (11 to 14), all of them were from E1 and none from e2 or 3. I knew i wasn't goona make it to Nanyang JC and started crying. I was disappointed. I went up and took my results , but i do not have the strength to turn it over. I wanted to wait for my mum to see it. I cried badly. All Bs on the result slip, without a single A. Wow.